Get Out!

Not to rub it in your face, but this weekend was, well, gorgeous, again. And when it's 104, and I'm melting in my air-conditioned car and Charlie's banned from the outdoors unless it's before 9 in the morning or after 9 at night, you can remind me of all the bragging I did in March, but geez, right now, I can't get enough.

This weekend we took advantage of Austin's awesome parks. We visited our old stomping grounds - Bull Creek - on Saturday, and Stan couldn't have been happier to be back. When I first moved to Austin I lived across 360 from this park, and we went over there every day after work. It's a beautiful little park with trails, water, picnic tables and plenty of room to run. We packed up a lunch and headed out for an afternoon of fun. Chuck loved...I mean LOVED...the water. It was freezing cold, but he was obsessed. We splashed our hearts out, and even then, Chuck was devastated when it was time to go. Rough life, Chuckster. On Sunday, we picked up Jimmy John's and headed to Mayfield. Luckily, my sister's family is in town, so we had quite a picnic crew. Mayfield is an awesome park with peacocks roaming freely, beautiful ponds with huge fish, great gardens and trails down to Lake Austin...perfection. Only drawback? It's a Stan-free zone. Bummer. But again, a perfect picnic, plenty of room for Chuck to cruise, and lots to see.

I hope you took the time to get out this weekend, to recharge your batteries, and to reset before the new week. Get outside, Austin!

Sweet Charlie Boy

Just when my heart feels like it'll explode at any minute, you do another sweet, funny or smart thing, and it somehow swells a little more. I love you everyday, of course, but there are some days where that love digs just a little deeper. I hope you'll know this kind of love, sweet boy. I hope you'll share this kind of love for me, your dad, a pet, a future brother or sister (I don't think we're going for both...sorry), a partner, and hopefully, one day, a child of your own. Because this overwhelming, heart-swelling love is truly awesome.

I somehow lucked in to spending my everyday with you - the sweetest, smartest, funniest, cutest, and most contented kiddo. And that's exactly what you are nowadays...a kiddo. At almost 11 months old there's no denying you're a total kid. You are, as your Papa called it, perpetual motion. And there are just too many memories I want to hold on to right now. Too many I want to keep forever.

Right now you are... 

Wanting to walk so badly you can hardly stand it (seriously, no pun intended). Just this weekend, because you had a ball in your right hand, you walked while only holding on to one of my hands. And this morning you did the same. It slowed you down and made you more cautious, but you totally did it. You can stand on your own now too, but only when you don't realize what you're doing. I know you'll get it all soon, and we'll be off to the races.

Showing your brain-power more and more everyday. We rode to the nursery Sunday to get some plants, and as you struggled to reach a water cup at the bottom of your bike trailer, I rode up alongside you and told you that your snack cup was beside your arm and pointed. I don't even know why I did it. I honestly expected we'd stop, and I'd grab both for you, but just when your dad started slowing down, you looked at me and then turned directly to your snack cup and happily went back to riding and eating. Your dad and I both marvelled at you. It may seem small and insignificant, but you are amazing to us. The things you understand and work to communicate are unbelievable. That little brain is working all the time. And even though you're not talking, you clearly understand. Amazing.

Laughing and make me laugh constantly throughout the day. Just today we were both in a fit of giggles because you were tightening your fists, straightening your whole body, and grunting all while watching yourself in the mirror in the backseat. Between grunts you would smile and laugh. I guess you were just confirming that yep, it looks as cool as it feels.

Saying "uh-oh" in the sweetest, softest voice. I can't seem to get you to do it for anyone but me and your dad, but oh my lord. I'll have to try to get it on video because your voice is just too sweet.

So big. When we stopped to eat lunch before the grocery store, a man typing away on his computer stopped for a brief stretch break raising his arms high above his head before getting back to work, and you, watching the entire thing, mirrored him over and over and over. Because to you that man was doing "so big" and well, you know all about being that.

Loving social laughter. Your friend Eddy has been in on every joke for months now, and it cracks me up to see him laugh just because all the adults start. And just this month you've started doing the same. It's this total cheeseball face and forced laugh, but it kills me.

Crazy about the grocery store. I don't know if it's your forever love of food or all the people fawning over you or all the bright colors and balloons, but we have a lot, I mean A LOT, of fun in there. You love when we push you way out in front and then yell, "Charlie - Come back!" and run over to the cart eagerly kissing your face. Giggles. Intense giggles.

Flapping your little bird arms in the air when you're really excited or want to be picked up or see a box of cheerios or want a dog to play with you. Just lately this is always happening in conjunction with your tongue sticking straight out. Arms flapping, tongue stretched, you might really be a baby bird. Which seems quite fitting because you are obsessed with birds right now - ducks, pigeons, crows, parrots (real or fake). All of them make you shriek.

Balling up on my chest and tucking your face into my neck, just like when you were a tiny infant, as you drift off to sleep at night. I get to feel your little eyelashes slowly open and close until you're out for the night. And even though I have the foresight to realize that's probably not going to be a very "cool" thing to do when you're bigger, the day this stops happening will be devastating. Every night I get a small reminder that you're still just my baby.

...

Sweet Charlie boy, how blessed we are to live our all day, everyday together and make these memories. How blessed I am to get to teach you about the world. My love is strong. I hope you feel it each and every day.

"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far. Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable." - Kahlil Gibran

Austin-style

We had a weekend. Our first nothing-on-the-calendar, nothing-we-have-to-do kind of weekend in a while. And oh man, we took advantage of it, the beautiful weather and this sweet city we live in each and every day.

Free SXSW shows at Whole Foods; breakfast, lunch and dinner outside; a bike ride to the grocery store; sleeping in until 9:15 (thank you, Charlie!); a hike at the Motorcycle Trails; a bike ride to the nursery; St. Paddy's day; and a celebratory dinner at a sweet (new-to-us) spot - Contigo; it was a ketchup-licking good time.

If you're a Texan you know these perfect 80 degree days and 60 degree nights won't last for long. We'll be heat advisoried and sweating in the shade in no time. Enjoy perfection while its here. Get outside! And if you're an Austinite, get out and explore this beautiful city. We're crazy lucky to live somewhere with an unbelievable amount of fun, active, free things to do. Capitalize!

Fail

Mom fail. Life fail. This afternoon I simultaneously failed at both. The morning started off right - Happy kid. Good breakfast. An offer from a friend to check an errand off our list. A solid nap. A shower. The day was mine for the taking.

Feeling like I'd already conquered this day, I decided to knock a not-so-pleasant errand off our list and pack up Chuck and finally get his blood draw done. We jumped in the car, and my oil light flashed, yet again. And since I'm making the trek north tomorrow and according to the sticker I should have changed my oil in October, I dropped the blood draw plan (happily) and turned towards the land of oil changes and car washes. It was 11:30 which gave me a solid chunk of time to get my car taken care of and head back home to feed Chuck and put him down for his 1:00 nap. Pulling in, James asked me if I wanted him to take care of my inspection while he was at it. Failure alert!

Why not? Thanks for noticing James. Oh, insurance. Well of course I have insurance...I'll find the card. (10 minutes later and still no card in the pile of paper vomiting out of my glove box.) Life fail.

James assured me I can just have my insurance fax one over to them. Sounds easy. I call Barry, our insurance agent, and nope. Not there. So I decide to shoot Barry an email as Chuck and I walk into the oil change holding area. I'm scanning scanning scanning through emails trying to find Barry's when I become aware that I look like the mom who can't break herself away from her iPhone for 5 minutes to interact with her child. Hold on Chuck...one more minute. This will be so quick. Email s - shit! The racks next to my chair literally exploded. Chuck, terrified, begins wailing in a sea of scent-your-car paraphernalia. Mom fail.

Scent-your-cars collected and email sent, I notice that everyone that was in the waiting room with us has now decided to wait on the patio outside. Mom fail.

As I fight the urge to walk outside and announce to all of them I'm trying to get my insurance card emailed over so I can knock out my inspection while I'm here, a guy walks in to ask me if I have my insurance yet. I try to announce really loudly that I'm still working on it, but he just gives me an odd look and declares I have a beautiful little girl. I nod and say thanks. Mom fail. (God, I hope I don't screw you up by my inability to correct people, Chuck.)

The 40 minute oil change, inspection and car wash has turned into an hour-long oil change. Life fail.

Please stop stalling, my insurance isn't coming. Just the oil change. Please, just the oil change. Okay, wash it, but really I have to go. Charlie is now starving. Weird Mum Mum's don't sustain him from breakfast to his afternoon nap. Mom fail.

And just when my back feels like it might finally break from walking our 99th lap around the parking lot, my car comes through the carwash. I head inside to pay setting Charlie down to further blacken his pants and germ-up his hands. One pass through the bag - ummm...that's weird. Two passes through the bag - certainly it's in here. Three passes through the bag - seriously? Momentary pause - yep, my wallet's on Chuck's nightstand. Life fail.

Mentally preparing myself to walk home (will they really not give me my car?) I sheepishly whispered to the front desk girl that I couldn't find my wallet. Sure, ma'am. Sure. No big deal. Why don't you...well, actually...just call me rather than coming back up here. Translation - I don't doubt your mess of a self left your wallet somewhere...if you even have a wallet. Please don't come back up here. Life fail.

We pulled back in the driveway at 1:02 only for me to realize I'd accidentally left Stan in the backyard. Mom fail.

Certainly, I've filled my quota of dumb nonsense for the year. But failures aside, we did get an oil change. And a car wash - which Charlie was enamored with. And Chuck's down for one of those good afternoon naps. The day's looking up from here, right?

Hitting Reset

"He doesn't really need to nap very much because he sleeps so good at night. We've been out of town. He's just so aware of everything now he can't seem to settle down. He might have an ear infection. We're being too loud. Our house is too small. Stanley getting a drink woke him up. It's too hot/too cold in here. I'm feeding him at the wrong time. His sleep sheep went off. The wind is crazy. He just loves to stand up. The postman - God, he puts the mail in our mailbox so loud!" Yep, all me. All craziness. And admittedly, these are just some of the outlandish justifications I've made trying to explain why Charlie's naps went downhill.

We'd had spells of this before. His morning nap has always been short, but in mid-January when both naps fell to 40 minutes, I think we both almost died. And it was never-ending. I tried everything...I even foiled his windows, but in hindsight, I did it in a half-ass, desperate kind of way, so it didn't work. But I was legitimately desperate. His lack of sleep made for a discontent, frustrated little guy and an exhausted mama. I couldn't walk out of the room. I couldn't feed him the way he wanted. Changing a diaper was like I was ripping his fingernails off. I kept telling him if he would just sleep he would feel soooo much better, but something was getting lost in translation. Somewhere in the midst of my desperation I made a doctor's appointment...on a Saturday. Embarrassingly, this is the third time I've made an appointment sure that he had an ear infection (or something!) only to find he's totally fine. I asked about teething remedies, feedings and sleep times. She assured me we were doing everything right, so WHAT WAS GOING ON?!

My mom came down at the end of February. Charlie's naps where still on the fritz, and I was working a.lot. Exhaustion doesn't even kind of cover it. After listening to my slew of unfounded excuses and seeing how light Charlie's room was, she agreed to make blackout curtains. We found an unbelievably cute print at Hobby Lobby, and mom sewed her little fingers off lining the fabric with dark grey fleece. We hung one up at a time until they were finished, and voila! Like magic he was taking long naps - hour-and-a-half to two-hour long, every time, kinda naps. And added bonus - he's going down for naps crazy easy (like as easy as he goes down at night). If he doesn't pass out in my arms, he quietly lays in his crib until he's just out. Way different than the fits of standing and crying we were dealing with. The cave-like darkness is a fantastic cue for sleep. Blackout curtains are literally life-changing. Life-saving. Going from 80 minutes to almost 240 minutes of time a day to get stuff done around the house, catch up on work emails, and I don't know, take a freaking shower has made this week a breeze. Let's keep up the good work, Chuck. And Gigi, well, we all know you're just a life-saver (and a wizard). Blackout curtains, y'all. Getcha some.

10 Months!

We're in the double digits!!! I, for real, cannot believe it. March of last year is unbelievably fresh in my mind - my belly was getting, well, quite large, we were having amazing baby showers and celebrating John's big 3-0. The year has flown.  

This month was a hard-fought one. Chuck battled a cold literally all month, and just when we finally put him on antibiotics because it moved into his sinuses, he got a stomach bug. Oof. Let's just say nobody's been sleeping too much around here. But, thankfully, Charlie's on the mend, and to celebrate his recent couple days of total wellness, Charlie, Stan and I (John's ridiculously sick) headed to the Zilker Kite Festival. And oh. my. What a freaking afternoon. It was a gorgeous, sunny, 80-degree day, and the boys couldn't have been more captivated. Charlie played in the sand, flirted with the ladies, and of course couldn't stop babbling and pointing at the kites.

Charlie's still crawling around like a madman and pulling up on everything. He wants to walk everywhere, but only if he's got both of your hands and can lean so far forward he looks like he might just fall right on his face. I'm not sure it's great practice for becoming an independent walker, but he just loves it. We need to just go ahead and buy him a little walker for the house because he's used a couple when we've been at the store, and he totally gets it. He gets going a little too fast, but I know he'd love being able to walk "on his own" around the house.

He's started eating meals of real food this month. We even ordered him his first kid's meal at Magnolia! Meals look a lot more like this now...

rather than the space-food packets he's been downing, and he's totally loving feeding himself. (Baby food is so nine months.) Although he's not too sure what to do about the texture of all the "new" food. He loves all sorts of different foods - eggs (yes, I won him over!), turkey, sweet potatoes, peas, broccoli, oatmeal, kale, pears, peaches, yogurt etc., but if it's not on a spoon, I'm having to pry open his jaw and shove the food in on the first bite. But after the shove, he'll pick it up and feed himself...what a primadonna!

We're loving the weather and have spent most of the month outside - playing in the sandbox, pulling weeds, splashing in random puddles, chasing Stan and taking long walks. Chuck's started to take off when we get to story time at the library; he loves to crawl up front and sit on the blanket with the big kids. It's super sweet to watch him mosey around breaking all sorts of personal space boundaries. He is super aware of, well, everything, and gets crazy excited when we pull up to his Gaga and Papa's house - he has all sorts of things he likes to check in on right when we walk in the door. And my mom came down for the last week of February to help with my crazy work schedule, and Charlie thought it was HILARIOUS to peek around the corner in the morning and see GiGi on the couch. What fun! But probably the best thing this month is the mamamamamama's and dadadadadadadadada's! Just when I was certain he wasn't purposefully directing the different inflections, he started crawling across the room to me adamantly calling mamamamama, and just when John was feeling low that he was saying mamama, he walked out of the room, and Charlie shouted DA! until John walked back in. Sweeter words have never been spoken. We're working on "up," "more," and "please" and "thank you". Ha! Just kidding about the manners, but I really hear him trying to master "up" and "more". We'll see. Chuck's just like the best little copy-cat lately, and I love to see what he picks up on and remembers. He knows John thinks it's hilarious when he does his bobble-head thing, he dances all around when his Gaga sings the Little Pookie book and leans in for a headbutt and a hug at different cues from my mom. What a freaking smarty.

For the moms that want it - Charlie's still up and down around 6:30/7:00, nursing four times a day (morning, after naps, and before bed) and eating real food at breakfast, lunch and dinner with snacks in between. He's going down for two naps, but, like I said, this was a rough month with all his sickness, so his sleep has been so off. Thanks to the antibiotics and my mom crafting some killer black-out curtains, this past week has been MUCH better.

Ten months of Chuck. Two more months until the big birthday. Just amazed. Everyday. Because even in the moments of pure frustration (i.e. - four weeks of a snotty nose), my heart is fuller than its ever been. This kid. This love. It's pure magic. Happy ten months, sweet boy.

So over baby food.