Lighting the Way

Thirteen years ago today my favorite girl in the entire world was born, and my sister became a mom. My mom woke me up early that morning to tell me she was heading to the hospital and would call. Before school started, Madi was already here, and I called my new boyfriend, John, bawling and barely coherent muttering, "I won't be at school. We had a baby. What?! I mean my sister had her baby." I was overcome. This little person felt like an extension of me from almost the moment she popped into this world. Maybe because she was the first baby of a sibling or maybe because I needed the positivity that she provided our family. I don't know, but Madi is a source of light for me. And watching my sister mother is my inspiration. 

For thirteen years I've been absorbing my sister's every mothering move, and she is a natural - nurturing, active, involved, brave, cautious, and confident. She's firm but flexible, sets boundaries without building walls, and loves with her entire being. She's raised two of the most amazing kids I've ever met. They're funny, smart, polite, thoughtful, adventurous and kind. And while my seventeen-year-old self believed Madi was just an "easy" kid, I now know my sister is just an amazing mom. Her instincts, whether on discipline or structuring playtime, will forever remain my model. Jennifer's helped me realize that motherhood is one part instinct, one part consistency and one part hope. 

And while instinct and consistency come easy, emulating Jennifer's level of hope will forever be something I strive to make my own. Because of her hope for her children, she's made some tough choices along the life and parenting spectrum, and even though I didn't always understand her choices at the time, I've come to trust and respect that she's doing what's best for her, for the sweet kids. And I've seen first-hand how this hope can transform. I hope so many things for our sweet Charlie, but mostly I hope for the strength in parenting that my sister displays at every milestone, every new step. 

Thirteen years of the most wonderful girl I've ever met. Thirteen years of watching my sister mother. But probably only one year of truly understanding what that kind of mothering really means. Understanding how a kiddo like Madison really happens. Happy birthday, Madi girl, and happy mothering, Jen. As Charlie enters all his new phases, your example will guide my instincts, and your hope will light my way.